1.    They see themselves as “friends” rather than teachers or parents
and define their role as supporting the mentee in a variety of ways.

2.    They are “ active listeners.”

3.    They make a commitment to being consistent and dependable, to maintaining a steady presence in the youth’s life.

4.    They understand that the relationship may seem fairly one-sided-they may feel like they are doing all the work-and they take responsibility for keeping the relationship alive.  For example, early in the relationship, youth often test adults to determine whether they will actually stick around.  Successful mentors regularly initiate contact and ensure meeting dates are kept.

5.    They involve the mentee in deciding how the pair will spend their time together.  While youth are often reticent about expressing what they want to do, successful mentors take the time to learn about the youth’s interests and provide them with options for how to spend their time, rather than planning everything without input from the youth.

6.    They pay attention to the mentee’s need for “fun”. Having fun together is a key part of building relationships, and it also provides the youth with valuable opportunities that may not be available to them.

7.    They seek and utilize the help of program staff.  Successful mentors recognize that they don’t have all the answers, and they value the support and guidance program staff can bring.